October 10, 2024
Ah, group projects. If I had a rupee for every time a group project left me pulling my hair out, I’d probably retire early. These so-called collaborative efforts are like a roulette wheel – sometimes you hit the jackpot with responsible teammates, but most of the time, you're stuck carrying the entire team like a pack mule. Case in point: my recent project, where I did all the work while my team watched from the sidelines. And when I say watched, I mean probably didn’t even know what was happening until the final deadline loomed.
Let’s rewind a bit. This project started with the usual enthusiasm. Karthik, Ruthveek, and Srikar were supposed to be my teammates. Supposed to be are the keywords here because in reality, the definition of teamwork got lost somewhere between the first meeting and the deadline. I knew from the beginning that this was going to be rough, but what I didn’t anticipate was how much of a disaster it would turn into.
We had a deal, or so I thought. I’d handle the heavy lifting, but at least they’d be there to support – answer my texts, show up for meetings, contribute something. Guess what? Not even close. They either went silent or threw in vague promises like “I’ll handle it later.” Spoiler: later never came.
Now, I’m no saint. I don’t mind working hard if it gets the job done, but when you have to babysit grown adults who can’t even manage to reply to messages, it gets frustrating. And the tipping point? Karthik's audacity to act like I was the problem. Let’s just unpack that for a second.
One of my brilliant teammates, Karthik, decided to turn this into a circus. He had the audacity to throw around words like “impotence” (yes, you read that right), which, to be honest, I think he was confused about. But beyond the grammar flubs and the delusion that he was doing me a favor, the real issue was the complete lack of responsibility. I mean, how can you call it a group project when no one but me is doing the work?
"You should’ve called me in the morning! Why didn’t you wait for an hour for the Xerox?"
I blocked him because – wait for it – he failed to lift a finger and expected me to chase him down. We were on the verge of missing deadlines, and he decided that his disappearing act was a strategic move. So I did what any rational person in my position would do: block out the noise (literally) and get on with the work. And surprise, surprise, he turns it into a personal attack, calling me “bullshit” for not babysitting him through every minor detail. Classic.
And then there’s the pièce de résistance: Xerox incident. Apparently, me getting the necessary project prints done in time without waiting for his approval was the equivalent of treason. Sorry, but if your phone is off and the deadline is looming, I’m not waiting around like a fool while you ghost. Sure, I said I’d call. But I didn’t because I was too busy ensuring we didn't tank the whole thing. And apparently, that hurt his feelings.
And as if things couldn’t get more ridiculous, he started rambling about how we couldn’t do the project from day one, and how it was my responsibility to make everything work because I’m the “head of the project.” Newsflash: being the team leader doesn’t mean I have to do everything for you while you sit back and relax. I informed, I called, I followed up. But when your team has the energy of a sloth on a lazy Sunday, there’s only so much you can do before you cut your losses and move on.
Let’s be clear: This wasn’t a situation where anyone was doing me favors. Karthik likes to think he “pitched in” by convincing others to join our team. But what’s the point if none of them can contribute even the bare minimum? It’s like inviting extra passengers onto a sinking ship – more weight, less progress.
And then, of course, came the age-old tactic of blame-shifting. Apparently, I was supposed to spoon-feed them every detail about the project. Really? We’re in our final year, and people still need reminders about basic responsibilities like showing up or contributing to the project? I gave updates when needed, I kept things moving, and all I got in return were excuses about how they didn’t know what was going on. How convenient.
In the end, I did everything – the documentation, the charts, the testing, the entire submission. I even handled the guide and made sure everything was in place for the final review. And when I asked for something as simple as making a ZIP file and submitting it, it was like pulling teeth.
"I never asked to join your team," Karthik said, with a straight face.
Really? I’m sorry, but if you didn’t want to be here, you should’ve spoken up from the beginning. Instead, you dragged your feet through the whole process and now have the nerve to complain? Nah, that’s not how this works. Being part of a team means contributing, not sitting on the sidelines and watching someone else carry the load.
So, what’s the takeaway here? Group projects are a litmus test for how people handle responsibility. Some step up, and others crumble. If you’re unlucky, like me, you end up dealing with a team that thinks doing the bare minimum (or nothing at all) is perfectly acceptable.
Next time someone tells you teamwork makes the dream work, remember this: it only works if everyone actually contributes. Otherwise, it’s just a nightmare where you’re stuck picking up the pieces.
And to Karthik, Srikar, Ruthveek, and the rest of the invisible squad – thanks for the memories. I hope the reality check hits sooner than later.